Out of the Rain, I Come for You

My mind is overwhelmed with the reality that I’ve been captured
melancholy rigor mortis becomes me
my spirit is heavier than my mind, my body
my legs shake, denying me mobility
i lay here, but i am not present
i want to stay
but I don’t know how to exist
in this space
I’m fighting
my mind is rotating 345, 360, 315
i daydrift into a dream
i am an earth goddess, spinning
needing to be with you
but needing my solitude

healing, with gel and latex
rubbing herbs into my soul
i contemplate
i look at my face through the fog
“you can do this” i say
affirmations is the way
i can say i love you and mean it
i can walk away,
but that doesn’t mean i’m leaving
just
feed me
food and water,
relieve me
I’ll give you the world
cause I have it,
just let me be free to choose

so I’ll close my eyes

and allow the fear to die,
so I can wake up

and be with you.

Rain

I am an Aquarius. we are slow to respond sometimes, because we’re thinking. let us.

more and more, I see, that excuses and blame are tools of the incompetent.
Say what you feel, before what you want gets away.

Love, Shila

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